the denizens of HELL

Aubergine's profile didn't garner that much attention...part of it was that I'd written it that way. I had fully expected to be the one to do the contacting...But part was, I think because I didn't post a photo. Men are pretty shallow (no. really. just like women.) and want to know if you look acceptable before they take it upon themselves to write something because writing's hard and not something to be undertaken lightly, unlike sex, which is easy and something to be undertaken whenever the fuck it can...Do I sound bitter? Well, maybe a little. The Internet is a mean place...not for the thin skinned or gentle. That's not to say I haven't encountered some really sweet and interesting men (although to find both those traits in the same man has been...rare.)

There have been some memorable characters to be sure. One of my favorites was...what can I call him? maybe Nick. Nick's profile in HELL was the funniest thing I've ever read, no exaggeration. I started laughing with his summary...the first thing you see...and I didn't stop until long after I'd finished the whole thing (and it was LONG. Nicky has a lot to say!) It had a kind of Monty Python ridiculousness about it that was irresistible to me. So I did what I had to do...I sent him an email complimenting him on it.
Nick emailed me back and we began a series of messages trying to outdo each other on the funny. He lives in a large city up North and has worked at several different jobs, all in creative fields. He's brilliant...scarily so. We'd never meet, but that was really OK with me. I was afraid if we met face to face, I wouldn't be able to keep up with him, intellect-wise. That's the good thing about email...you can seem smarter than you really are because you can take your time posting, not like conversation where you look like a moron if you take more than a few seconds to formulate your response. So, in person, we wouldn't have been so good, but as email friends, we were golden.
After the first few conversations, we stopped trying so hard to be funny and began to talk more about things that really matter...like movie stars of long ago and what made them beautiful! We had a fairly serious disagreement about this one star, who shall remain nameless, even though she's been dead for years. Nicky went on and on about her beauty and, well, he was just mistaken. He was right though, when he said that the stars of yesterday were more beautiful than stars of today. He couldn't explain it (one of the few times Nick was stumped), nor can I, but nevertheless, it is undeniably true.
After awhile, our emails just kinda stopped, a phenomenon not uncommon in my experience and about which, more later...

--Ina